We’re experiencing a gradual transition from the house of mass participation in all designated events to the house of many free wills. Tess is trying out swim team, which means a dinner time drive once a week in a house where one parent often comes home after dinner. Remy gets to start skiing with poles, and is really taking to the sport. I smell a few extra drives out to the ski hill in our future. He also had the tough choice of attending a school party or performing at Joy’s school event and leading the college kids in “Lift every voice”. He was so torn, and I can only hope the school party lived up to his expectations. The logistics get a bit nuts, but when these tiny opportunities for self-definition rear their fabulous heads, we do our best to say yes and transfer a thimbleful of power into our developing people.

This week, that meant employing the whole army of friends, sitters, family and favors. On top of planning for the 3 March birthdays (!!!), I made a decision to drag Dave to Chicago for a one-day date – to see a long Russian opera that is rarely performed. We ate great food, talked through 8 million side conversations we haven’t been able to finish, and were astounded at the detailed ballet our peeps handled at home that included two people taking four people to ski lessons. Our good fortune is incredible, and that becomes our kids’ good fortune as well. They’re not the only ones who need to remember they’re individuals.

So we dive back into the new week with stories of adventure, and watch our kids start to choose their own paths even as we redefine our own. Our house is messier, the laundry is undone, but the satisfaction resonates far and wide. (Remind me I said that when no one can find their socks.)