So Dave was let go a couple of weeks ago and work for me has been crazy all summer. As an added bonus, our summer nanny is so talented and busy that we agreed to be friends and part ways on the home front. (I hope she’s serious about the friends thing – such a cool lady!) Still, we managed to find time to enjoy the kids as they get older. That aside, something freaky happens when you’re staring down the barrel of unemployment with two little kids. I wasn’t worried about Dave finding a job – in fact he’s already found a job – but it did make me nervous. And nervous means I couldn’t enjoy my limited time with my family as much as I usually do.

Dave’s new job is in Chicago – with flex time and working from home and all those great things – but still Chicago, and it’s making it hard for me to look forward to the fall is much as I normally do. Can we handle life with Dave based out of Chicago? Will we need extra babysitting? How will this affect my job? And our kids? The answer to all of these is probably

everything will be okay.

We always find a way and our life has been nothing but exciting and joyful since we got married. Don’t worry – I’m not completely insane; I haven’t forgotten the years of miserable infertility and sadness and frustration. But all that aside we’ve got it pretty good. Still, to be changing jobs and changing sitters and changing cities and changing focus all at the same time is a lot to handle for someone who dislikes change; a.k.a. me.

Before you ask, Dave’s new job is phenomenal. He’s landed on his feet and I’m delighted for him. We’re still looking for another sitter for the fall, but I think we found an awesome addition to the roost last week. She’s starting tomorrow. Yay! The kids are doing great and I don’t think any of that’s going to change. Tess is sounding out words and walking around- even dancing. Remy is smiling and rolling over. He loves food – no surprise. Everything seems to be as it should be.

So as the leaves start to turn and the nights get cooler, we will embrace changes. We will watch Tess’ confidence grow and Dave’s smile get bigger every day as he plays with his new nerdy languages. We’ll watch Remy get bigger, our house get better and spend time with family.

Speaking of family, my university family is coming in shortly to celebrate Remy’s baptism. We can’t wait! We got our long-awaited deck recently. We sat outside and enjoyed the evening with some friends and family, and realized that in a short week, we will be sitting around the table with people we love dearly from far, far away. As time speeds up, my appreciation for time with all of the people I love grows. This weekend of adventure will be as wonderful and epic as every weekend or moment that I get with these people. Have I mentioned it’s Harley Fest over Labor Day? I sure hope they like bikers.

2 thoughts on “Insecurity

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