Well, this was unexpected! Dave and I got lots of quality time with Tess – she did much better at kangaroo! – as well as having a nice brunch together and seeing a movie (John carter of mars). It actually felt like Saturday. Who knew?
Tess is getting fortified milk and tolerating it well. She’s still on high- flow air, but they told us she’s lucky not to be on a ventilator. So we’re still in preemie healthy happy land. Still, a nurse called her a micro preemie today and my heart sank. I don’t know how to describe what holding your breath for weeks feels like. Tess’ roommate is graduating and going home. It’s given us a peek at what the future holds, but it also made going home feel that much farther away. It makes me tired just thinking of all the weeks stretching out ahead of us. I guess the closest thing is watching someone try to get sober – it really is one day at a time, one hour, one minute. I don’t mean to be negative, as Tess is skating through these important early weeks, but the fear doesn’t shrink based on her success so far. The nurses said when she had an open PDA they were almost relieved; no kid’s NICU experience is this smooth.
All that to say, we are really, truly grateful for every day she doesn’t have an infection, or lose weight, or seem crankier than usual.
Today she tried out a new trick: sticking her tongue out! It looked like she was licking her hand. 🙂 apparently that’s a great development step, and goes along with her mauling her pacifier any time she can keep it in her mouth. They’re thinking she’ll be a great eater when we can use bottles.
So to return to the waiting and the worry, tiny things like hand-licking excite us, and crankiness makes us panic. It’s like the extreme sports version of having your first child. Thank god we have nice nurses and good friends!