I worry sometimes that this blog comes off as chipper; that we’re unrealistically portraying our family as this happy-go-lucky, problem-free, perky team. I guess I’ve figured out over the last few years that freaking out takes a lot of energy and doesn’t go anywhere. So I still freak out sometimes, but the rest of the time I choose to roll my eyes, swear a little, and laugh with whoever helps me see the humor (including the kids!). I don’t take child-rearing, adoption or premature development lightly. I know we’re lucky to be employed, to have flex time at work, to have family support – I know a lot of people don’t have that at all, so that takes a huge edge off any frustration that arises. But seriously, laughing it off is keeping us sane and happy. I’m catching on that life unspools the way you perceive it, like the way I can choose to see my body’s imperfections or to see myself the way my husband sees me. We all have to make those choices constantly, and god knows I’m not consistent; but how Dave and I see things will impact how our kids see things, from snow to big feet to people’s choice of words. For example, I’m working on letting go of my fears for Remy in a city that historically struggles with race. So far, the warm welcome his cute little self has received does as much as anything to assuage any fears my creative imagination produces. So if that makes me chipper, so be it. As someone who’s naturally a realist (and often called a pessimist), rosy glasses do make life seem a little cheerier, so I’ll keep them on for now.
I have a new mantra, learned from wise Debbie:
Pardon my passion.
I choose to no longer apologize for my joy and opinionated thoughts. They both define me, and while I am always aware of when they spill over, I can ask for understanding rather than dampen my joie de vivre. Love it!
Speaking of friends we laugh with, this week has been amazing. Because Remy kept threatening to come early and Tess was still in RSV season, Dave and I made very few plans with people in January, February or March. Apparently, we’re now making up for lost time. We’re seeing friends left and right, going for walks and coffee and scheduling dinners. It’s a little overwhelming, but so fun! We kind of feel like we’re coming out after a storm, as we’re not waiting for a phone call or frantically trying to get projects done before we have to potentially take off. So thank you to everyone who’s stopped by or met up with us! This has been one of the best weeks of my life I’m pretty sure. 🙂
We’re still not completely functioning yet. When I went to my lesson Tuesday, the kids had an epic meltdown for Dave. I was gone an hour and he’d aged a year. I’d laugh, but it happens to me too! Leaving the house continues to intimidate me for that reason, as I’m never sure whether I’m taking our sweet kids out or the holy terrors that wear their faces from time to time. Still, I know moms with way more kids, so I know it’s just a matter of learning how to do this. Each attempt shows improvement, yet we still had howling Remy in the photo shop yesterday afternoon.
Despite that, Tess had her first official play date yesterday with Wyatt and they were adorable. She also learned how to use a straw at lunch with Sarah and played in the kids’ area at the resto when we went to dinner. With other kids! Pretty amazing. Now we have to work on what’s okay and what isn’t, as stealing other kids’s pacifiers out of their mouths required a full
Tess Ingela Oplinger, no!
, which startled me as much as it did her, I think! She listened. 🙂
It’s April 5, Remy’s due date. He jumped the gun a little, but we’re watching him slowly come out of his coma into the world of open eyes. It helps that Tess finally took a solid nap, so I got to snuggle with her brother for a few hours. Amazing. I can’t say he’s bounding with energy, but the cries are getting louder, the meals bigger, and those sweet eyes are peeping out at who’s holding him. I sense things are going to get interesting.