Carrying on

As we wait to hear news about “the package”, we’re trying to embrace routine and have fun with our friends while we have some free time. Time seems to creep, then fly. It’s frustrating, then tolerable as we make the kids laugh or sing them to sleep.

The empty room next to us feels weird. For a while, I would sit in there thinking about the upcoming family addition. When we thought the worst, I sat in there to mourn and readjust my expectations. Now I avoid it. There’s so much hope in my heart that if I allow myself to focus on it, it overwhelms me. Concentrating on Tess and Remy is more productive for all of us. So we go to the zoo, we read stories and snuggle while watching Caillou for the first time (which does seem to hypnotize them). No new news and more waiting. Here’s hoping we have a distracting rest of the month!

In the meantime, Tess and Remy are growing and aging. They speak frankly about skin and eye color (although Remy says Joy’s blue now and again to see if we’re listening), say please to each other when we’re not watching, and love to help in the kitchen and the yard. They’re fascinated by Kat’s butterfly gift, and are practicing saying “chrysalis”. We moved the chrysalis collection to the big cage last night while Tess was asleep, and this morning she looked astounded to see them in a new place – like she realized they would be changing soon. Remy sings all day, and does a little dance to accompany himself. Our kids are happy, and that’s awesome to see. They’re developmentally on track and rocked their annual checkups this week!

As for “the package”, today makes 34 weeks! For preemie parents, that marks another significant milestone, so potentially minimal NICU time. Jocelyn got steroid shots and is on bedrest, so we’re ready for anything! It’s hard to tamp down the expectation of a phone call while trying to work and parent, but that’s our reality for the time being.

Also our reality? Kids who do not comply. We tried for a