Birthmother’s Day and Mother’s Day

As parents who’ve faced infertility, I wonder if we’ll ever take Mother’s Day or Father’s Day for granted. The fact that Birthmother’s Day comes right before (Saturday) means the whole weekend feels inspiring and makes me reflective.

First of all, K and Kat, thank you so much for choosing us! We love our kids ferociously, and while at times we sound exasperated or tired, we revel in their existence and their personalities every day. We see pieces of you peeking out their eyes and just smile. We’ve all contributed to making them who they are and will be, and that’s incredibly cool. Happy Birthmother’s Day to both of you.

Second of all, hearing our kids say “maman” makes my heart melt every time. As I contemplate how uniquely our histories melded together, I grin at my good fortune. In fact, people often tease me because I’m happy a lot – but my current life is precious to me, and being sent off to work with a slobbery Remy hug and Tess blowing me kisses reignites my good mood every day.

So Mother’s Day has lost it’s brittle edge. I celebrate my motherhood, my mother and grandmothers, my fellow moms – those newly initiated and those who’ve suffered losses and have the same gratitude I have. I even try to picture Tess as a parent one day, equally delighted and exasperated by her children! Happy Mother’s Day to all of the moms reading this, whether experienced or novice – moms who’ve lost, merged, found, shared, adopted, birthed or loved a child as their own.

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